Sarah Sherman founded a charity that provides everything from toiletries to clothing to survivors of sexual assault or intimate partner violence who have gone through a medical exam
After Sarah Sherman’s estranged husband broke into her home, sexually assaulted her and tried to kill her, she underwent a gruelling, hours-long forensic sexual assault exam in hospital in Nanaimo.
The police kept her clothing as evidence, so she was released wearing “paper hospital booties, paper maternity underwear, no bra, and a two-piece hot pink velour outfit that didn’t fit me,” said Sherman, who recently shared her story in the short CBC documentaryBehind Closed Doors, directed by Robert Gow.
Leaving the hospital after enduring the worst experience of her life felt like a walk of shame.
“It felt like everyone knew what I had been through,” said Sherman, the founder of We’re Here For You Canada, a registered charity that provides “comfort kits” that include toiletries and clothing to survivors of sexual assault or intimate partner violence who have gone through a medical exam.
Sherman, who still deals with the trauma of what happened that November day in 2004, said she didn’t want anyone to feel like she did that day. “Everyone deserves dignity and respect.”
Although she was able to escape and call police after the attack, her former husband managed to pick up her youngest daughter from school.
When he saw the police behind him, he drove into another car. The resulting wreck killed him and a child in the other car, and seriously injured one other person. Their daughter was also seriously injured, but survived.
It took Sherman years to find her voice, and begin to speak about the tragedy. In December 2021, nearly 20 years later, it was time to speak out.
“I had to tell my story in order to help others,” said Sherman. “I had been carrying so much guilt and shame. I want survivors to know they are not alone, they shouldn’t be ashamed, and they haven’t done anything wrong.”
She also hopes no survivor ever has to leave the hospital partially dressed and carrying their belongings in a blue and white plastic bag, feeling like others might be speculating about what happened to them.
Each kit contains toiletries, a gift card for a meal, new clothing that fits properly, footwear, information on supports, and a carry bag that is discrete and new, so survivors can have dignity, respect and privacy, said Sherman.
Gow called Sherman “one of the most inspirational people I have ever met.”
“Her charity highlights a need in the Canadian medical system that most people are not aware of. No one wants to talk about the lack of resources for sexual-assault survivors,” he said, adding: “This story shows that hope and a happy life is possible after experiencing so much horror.”
Sherman, who now lives in New Brunswick, said it was important to her to launch the charity in Nanaimo, where the incident occurred, but she hopes to expand the project across Canada.
“It’s a gradual process because it’s all volunteer-run,” said Sherman.
With every opportunity she gets to share her story, including the short film, Sherman said she feels a little stronger. “I want people to know they are not alone. There is help.”
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